It’s not new to say that our society revolves around drinking and birthday parties, holidays, celebrations, heck, the weekend are all implied to include alcohol consumption. It’s why so many in our wellness community looking to live a “high vibe life” decide to choose sobriety over substances. I attended a beautiful panel with some of my closet friends all about alcohol and choosing sobriety—it got me thinking.
It went deep and offered a great starting point for this conversation. A conversation like many in this space is saturated with the shoulds and should not’s. Like celery juice, matcha lattes, intermittent fasting, and even superfoods I believe there is a time, a place and a balance to it all.
Which is why I choose conscious consumption over sobriety. Why, you ask?
I will say that I know many who choose to live a sober life and their lives are equally abundant, happy and loving. It’s true that society as a whole shouldn’t be alcohol-focused and the more conversations we have about sobriety the more we create a positive change. The more we’ll feel a release from societal pressures to choose alcohol or drugs because it’s what everyone else is doing. Instead, that choice will come back to our control. To following our intuition.
But, here it is. I’m against complete sobriety.
To preach sobriety could have a negative effect. It stigmatizes everyone who drinks a glass of wine at a family dinner or smokes a bit of marijuana to mellow out in the evenings are not living up to their fullest potential, are not living a life of bliss, of light and of profound love.
I find substances have a time and a place. We drink wine on Shabbat, for Passover and other holidays + celebrations. I use alcohol and drugs to enhance the intention behind it whether that’s to love what life has given me, deepen the connection with my husband or celebrate the joy and support I have in all my sisters.
It’s when drinking is used as a crutch to hide deeper issues that it becomes a problem. It’s when you depend on alcohol or drugs to numb whatever you’re afraid to confront. Once you’ve done the work, dug in, brought awareness to all that’s holding you back, and released it from your life then the balance can be restored and you can rely on your inner-knowing to use substances for connection and for celebration.
How can you begin to live a life of moderation rather than total abstinence?
Anything can be toxic and considered “poison” if used excessively and used to hide away from whatever is going on below the surface. This is the same for all the considerably “healthy” activities. The key is to use any substance or any experience with intent.
If you’re INTENTIONAL, the mechanisms in your brain will send messages to your operating system so the substances used will connect rather than disconnect. Any substance done with the intent behind it can be ceremonial - cacao, ashwagandha, MDMA, or psychotropic substances, to name a few - have been used in healing and grounding ceremonies for years. I use MDMA to deepen my connection with my husband and cacao is commonly used in heart-opening ceremonies and to deepen meditations. It’s using them for a PURPOSE, not a distraction.
The use of alcohol and drugs in this form will sustain all the magic and joy of the experience. Our minds and bodies are untapped and restrained so much of the day, using drugs and alcohol to only enhance the human body experience and expand the realm of possibilities in this universe is magic.
If you find yourself wanting to be sober look into the WHY. Is there fear? Anxiety over the loss of control? This is where there the healing and growth work is begging to be done.
Abstinence isn’t the only answer!! If you want another option, check out The Abstinence Myth by Adi that offers an entirely new perspective to actually heal from abuse and addiction rather than numbing out and pushing it away.
Instead of choosing sobriety while you do the deep work within, experiment with being “sober curious.” In the IGNTD Recovery Secrets podcast, Adi connected with Ruby Warrington all about her new book, Sober Curious and her approach to going alcohol-free that is much more forgiving and empowering. Listen here!!
Remember loves, life isn’t all that serious. Enjoy it. Embrace it. Soak up every moment as they come. As long as you show up to yourself entirely you'll already be a more present, powerful and captivating soul.
Did any of this resonate with you? I would love your thoughts!! Share with me in the comments below or connect with me on Facebook using #PhilosophieLove.