Today I turn T H I R T Y.
This is the first birthday that I feel completely + utterly my age. I feel connected to where I've been + tuned in to where I'm going. I am proud of my age: it feels authentic + true, I am exactly where I'm supposed to be.
It truly is just a number... a subjective, relative number that actually holds very little meaning. My "age" is my maturity, my experience, how I view the world + my place in it.
Today is a new moon ☾ + there's no coincidence there. It's been weeks of turbulent times astrologically, and I feel confident in the newness of this phase.
Sensual, beauty-loving, occasional stubborn Taurus is my sun sign. It rules the finer things in life—a homemade salad with an exquisite glass of pinot noir, a barefoot walk in the grass, a long, slow massage. During the Taurus season (mid April to mid May) we feel more than usually inclined toward such indulgences. At the Taurus New Moon, like the one that arose Monday evening (april 28), we plant new seeds for creative projects, deepen the love in our relationships, and generally celebrate new life.
This New Moon is also a solar eclipse, intensifying Taurean themes like security, finances + commitments of all kinds. Yet because the Taurus is ruled by peace-loving Venus, + messenger Mercury makes beautiful aspects at the New Moon, the stage is set for a calmer, more stable period ahead. Yeee Haw!
“It is not true that people stop pursuing dreams because they grow old, they grow old because they stop pursuing dreams.”
― Gabriel García Márquez
“The more sand that has escaped from the hourglass of our life, the clearer we should see through it.”
― Jean-Paul Sartre
The humans I created in this decade:
“A twenty-three-year-long study in Ohio determined that people who saw growing older as something positive lived a whopping seven and a half years longer than those who didn’t. (356)”
― Victoria Moran in Younger by the Day: 365 Ways to Rejuvenate Your Body and Revitalize Your Spirit
I feel humbled + powerful at the same time that I can hold the "pen" // magic powers to conduct my own life.
I've been through many phases in my life -- an epically abusive way-too-long-lasting relationship, extreme veganism for 7 years, super crazy raw foodie for almost a year, hardcore yogi who practiced every day or else I felt "off"... the list goes on. Luckily, a more balanced middle way is firmly rooted now. I appreciate that rooting.
I have lived several lives in this lifetime. I have been through more in 3 of my lives than most people I know experience in one. Through all the pain, through all the challenges, I found my grounding even deeper + my heart even more open. Life is Love. I am Love.♡
I want to live a life f u l l of freedom.
Freedom of thought, freedom of love, freedom to BE my truest most authentic self; without guilt or holding back. 30 years have already passed, I don't want another day without liberation + truth. This journey has served as a realization in + of my truth. I am so proud for the way I view my body, as a woman, especially living in Los Angeles, at this point in my life. The healthy, balanced relationship I share with it makes me feel confident to grow a healthy girl if I ever have one.
The time I spend on this planet needs to be meaningful. Time speeds by quicker than one can explain when you're a momma.When I reflect on the speed at which my life has gone by thus far, I would say it has mostly whizzed by in the blink of an eye. But then there are times, when moments creep by as slow as molasses. My two pregnancies felt like they lasted forever + 1 day. I wouldn't trade those long, heavy, bittersweet afternoons in the last months of my pregnancy or the torturous ones in the beginning when I couldn't keep anything in my body. I trust the process much more now than ever before. It all happens E X A C T L Y as it's supposed to.
On this day, of all days, I reflect on where I've been + where I stand today, deeply rooted. My earthly sun sign, Taurus, has taught me so much about Mother Earth/Nature + how at home I feel being in her arms. I'm a person who craves consistency + I'm glad to know who I am + what feels natural. ☮
I feel proud of my experiences + beyond stoked for the soulful, spirited journeys in my future.
MY HEART IS HEAVY WITH GLOWING GOLD LIGHT AS I REFLECT ON MY GRATITUDE.
INTENSE, LOVELY, SISTER FRIENDSHIPS, MY GORGEOUS, SPIRITED FAMILY/CHILDREN + A PROFESSION THAT CHOSE ME INSTEAD OF THE OTHER WAY AROUND... WOW, I'M FEELING FULL TODAY.
THANK YOU, UNIVERSE. ☼